Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Think again. I’ve witnessed my mother’s complete metamorphosis at age 67. It proves to me that change is possible at any age, and that we shall never give up on ourselves and those we love.
For the most of my life, I remembered my mother as an unhappy woman. She was very smart and had many talents. However, she didn’t pursue her own dreams in order to “keep our family together.” But deep down, she resented us. And it showed.
Growing up, I’ve learned many good qualities from her – her determination, her pursuit of perfection and her generosity. But I’ve learned just as much, if not more, in trying not to be like her. I learned that I must follow my heart and my dreams, always.
For a long time, I didn’t have a great relationship with my mother. Sometimes I wondered if this was the reason that I had to run across the Pacific Ocean to be so far away from home. On my own journey to healing, I came to realize that the unresolved emotional issues I had with my mother were the source of my PMS anger outbursts, and that I needed to untie those knots in order to set myself free.
Over the years, I initiated several dialogues trying to sort out the issues with my mother. But every time I tried I seemed to hit a hard wall. It seemed to bring more pain, more suffering, and more tears and anger to both of us. There were moments I thought I would never be able to tear down that wall. My mother would never change, and we would never have the intimate relationship I’d desired and longed for my whole life.
But I didn’t give up. The major breakthrough finally came when I had a heart-to-heart conversation with my mother when my parents came to visit me several years ago. For the first time, she listened to me and acknowledged the pains I experienced growing up.
And that was all I needed. At that magical moment, we were both set free. In tears, we embraced each other. I felt that I saw her soul for the very first time, and she saw mine. Since that day, I began to see her life transforming in front of my own eyes.
She started joining a group of women to practice yoga in her neighborhood. And she began to make friends with them. In a short couple of years, she’s become a yoga instructor for her growing yoga community. And she’s practicing singing diligently in order to improve her vocal performance. This is something I would not have imagined, not in a million years!
She has regained her self-confidence and found a renewed purpose in her life. She is in shape and she is happy. Her personal transformation is also transforming everything in her life – her relationship with my dad, with me, and with everyone else.
I’m so proud of my mom. I truly am.
I want to share this with you, because I want you to know that change is possible, no matter how hard it may seem at first.
Perhaps there are some things you want to change about yourself or someone you love – something that’s holding you both back from creating better health, a more meaningful relationship, and a more fulfilling life.
If so, have that difficult conversation. Face the pain, for sometimes pain is the necessary catalyst for change. Keep cracking at it. Every effort makes a small crack in that big, hard rock. But you never know that one day the little crack might just pop open and make the impossible possible. And the reward is sweet and marvelous!
If my mother can transform her life, so can you!