Last night my friends Joanne and Alex came over for dinner. We were talking about meditation and how it had changed our lives. I mentioned that one day I’d love to create a meditation center and a moon lodge for women.
“What’s a moon lodge?” Alex asked curiously.
“A moon lodge is a place where menstruating women can go to meditate, rest, find solitude or bond with other women,” I replied.
“Wow. Sounds like a place that men should stay as far away from as possible. We wouldn’t get anywhere near it!” Alex responded with a naughty grin.
I was quite sure that he saw some pretty interesting images in his head. And he didn’t hesitate to share them with us, with great delight.
“I just can’t see you turning into a devilish PMSing woman. You’re too sweet and calm for that,” said Alex.
“Well, I’ve seen it,” said my boyfriend Dean. “In the past, I didn’t know what it was, and I thought some of the women I’d dated were just nuts. Until I met Jing and I finally realized what it was – PMS.”
Interestingly, I didn’t know what it was either, until I met Dean. We actually helped each other understand it and solved the PMS puzzle together. What a blessing!
We’ve both learned to recognize the signs and symptoms of PMS.
And I think this is by far the most important thing in managing it – for both women and men. Only when you recognize the signs of PMS can you can come up with strategies to effectively manage it.
Here are a few signs we both learned from our experiences:
1. Sudden mood changes
This is one of the key characteristics of PMS. For example, she’s usually sweet, happy and gentle, then suddenly she looks depressed, moody, irritable or angry. It may be due to something that’s troubling her, or it may be PMS, especially if the moodiness persists for a few days.
2. Binging on sweets
Her craving for carbohydrates, sweets such as cakes and chocolates, could also indicate that she’s using food to find comfort during the premenstrual discomfort. On the other hand, she may loose her usual appetite and experience digestive problems such as diarrhea, vomiting, nausea, etc.
3. Low energy
If she’s generally healthy and energetic, and suddenly she feels tired and exhausted for more than a couple of days, this could be a sign of premenstrual fatigue.
4. Physical discomfort
Discomforts such as a distending sensation or pain in her chest, epigastric, abdominal or hypochondric regions are signs of PMS. Headache, dizziness, vertigo, tinnitus, flushed face and red eyes, lower backache, and insomnia are also common signs of PMS.
5. Recurring patterns
If any of the above signs recur every month at around the same time, it’s a strong indicator that she’s experiencing PMS. The best strategy is to track her cycle and know when it’s coming.
Both Dean and I get an email reminder 10 days before my period. We also get another one 1 day before. It’s a gentle reminder for both of us to be more mindful during this period of time.
Recognizing the signs and symptoms of PMS has helped us create a loving and supportive relationship during the stormy premenstrual phase of my cycle. It has also helped strengthen our already strong bond because I know that he accepts all of me and supports me in difficult times.
So gentlemen out there! Please don’t run away from your lady when she’s PMSing. If you can stay with her and support her through PMS, you’ll be rewarded with her precious heart. So start by paying attention to the signs of her premenstrual symptoms every month.
What kind of experiences have you had in your relationships? Please leave a comment and share with us.