Self-esteem and PMS

Lately the subject of self-esteem has been swimming in my head. “How do we know if we have a healthy or poor self-esteem? Is there an objective measure other than our own assessment, which may be biased and subjective?” I found a 10-question quiz that you can take in less than 5 minutes to score your self-esteem. Check it out and take the test, for fun or as food for thought.

Score your self esteem here.

From my own experience and observation, self-esteem seems to affect every relationship we have – at work, at home, in romance, in our friendships and alone with ourselves. It seems to color our every experience in relation to the world.

Healthy self-esteem

often correlates with rationality, realism, intuitiveness, creativity, independence, flexibility, our ability to manage change, our willingness to admit (and correct) mistakes, benevolence, and cooperativeness.

Poor Self-esteem

often correlates with irrationality, blindness to reality, rigidity, fear of the new and unfamiliar, inappropriate conformity or inappropriate rebelliousness, defensiveness, over-compliant or over-controlling behaviors, and fear of, or hostility towards, others.

Self-esteem also affects our moods – emotional states that last for prolonged periods of time. Poor self-esteem seems to cause feelings of shame, guilt, apathy, depression, fear, compulsion and obsession, anger and pride.

Healthy self-esteem seems to cause feelings of courage, contentment, optimism, acceptance, curiosity, love, joy and peace.

So if self-esteem is so vital to our existence and our experience of the world. What is self-esteem, really?

Dr. Nathaniel Branden, a psychotherapist and writer known for his work in the psychology of self-esteem, summed it up well. According to Dr. Branden, self-esteem has two interrelated components: one is a sense of basic confidence in the face of life’s challenges: self-efficacy; the other is a sense of being worthy of happiness: self-respect. Self-esteem is, therefore, the disposition to believe oneself competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and to be worthy of happiness.

I will leave you with these thoughts to think about. “How’s your self-esteem? And how does it affect your relationships and life experiences?”

Did you take the test? If so, let me know if it is accurate in your opinion.