This weekend my boyfriend’s mom came for a visit from the East Coast. She’s in her 70s, a very kind and sweet lady. At dinner she reminisced about the good old days, and out of curiosity I asked if she’d ever had PMS or menopause. Excuse me, but I just couldn’t help it…
“I didn’t have PMS, but I had a terrible menopause. For four to five years I couldn’t sleep at night, no matter how hard I tried. Most of the time I felt exhausted and short tempered. It was awful. Then one day, it just went away and I was able to sleep again,” she said.
“I had no idea. Why didn’t you say anything about it, Mom?” My boyfriend seemed stunned that his mom had suffered in silence for so many years and that he hadn’t a clue.
“Did your husband know about it?” I asked. “He knew about it, but he didn’t know what to do. He just avoided me as much as he could,” she said, a little embarrassed.
Later on, my boyfriend told me how he wished his mom had said something about her suffering, so they could have found some way to help her.
After this, I begin to wonder how many women suffer from PMS and menopause in pain and in silence. Is this necessary? If we all say something to the ones closest to us, and educate them about what we’re going through and how they can help, would things turn out differently?
Perhaps we’ll gain their support and understanding. Perhaps we’ll suffer less.
How about you? Are you suffering in silence? Or are you witnessing someone you love suffering in silence? It’s time to have an open and candid conversation and bring it out into the open.
When there’s understanding and love, suffering ceases to be suffering…